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The first is superficial "small talk" with little personal information about the speakers.
The next layer is intimate, with increasing breadth and depth and more personal details.
However, as the relationship goes on, the wedge should become broader and deeper, including more topics of personal significance.
The wedge must drive through three "layers" in order for intimacy to develop.
In return, the other will disclose something and behave in such a way so as to be responsive to the initial disclosure's content, while also conveying a degree of understanding and validation for what was revealed.
Three theories describe reciprocity: The social attraction-trust hypothesis, social exchange theory and the norm of reciprocity.
Reciprocity is a positive response from the person with whom one is sharing information, whereby the person who received the disclosure self-discloses in turn.
Self-disclosure usually influences whether two people will want to interact again.
The degree to which the information revealed is private or personal is the depth of that disclosure.In order to develop a more intimate relationship, partners must increase the breadth and depth of their conversations.Breadth includes the variety of topics two people discuss and depth is the personal significance of these topics.The third explanation, the norm of reciprocity, argues that reciprocating disclosure is a social norm and violating it makes a person uncomfortable.There are two types of reciprocity: turn-taking reciprocity and extended reciprocity.